How influential are you?
Have you stopped to think lately about what level of influence you have over people? To put it another way; Do people listen to you and respect your opinion? This is especially important in your job, whether at the base or in management. People follow leaders, whether they have a job title or not. If you are unable to persuade people and win them over to your way of thinking, you may find yourself relegated to the lower echelons of society.
Every day we are presented with opportunities to influence others. It can come in the form of a law enforcement officer ready to issue you a ticket, or his boss challenging parts of your presentation, or when you have to return a pair of shoes to the department store without a receipt. How you handle these everyday challenges, in turn, makes or breaks your ability to shine in high-profile situations, where your persuasive skills are on full display.
Your most powerful tool
Do you want to know the most powerful tool you have at your disposal when it comes to influencing people? I learned and perfected this strategy over a period of 4 years, while working as a contract negotiator for the Department of Defense. I must have learned my lesson well, because I was named one of the top negotiators in my field and received the coveted award for superior performance sustained by high-level achievement.
This tool is so powerful that most people (at all levels of organizations) completely miss it, yet it has been shown to be extremely effective in study after study. What is it you ask? It is the “psychology of a smile”. That’s how it is; a smile. Why is it so powerful? Because it has no language barriers-none. I have tested this theory all over the world. No matter where you travel, all people, in all languages, understand your message. A smile is the universal language of winners. The reason I call it a tool is because, like any tool, it works in the right situation.
It was President Abraham Lincoln who said that man is ultimately responsible for the condition of his face. How true is this. So the next time he’s tempted to use the anger tool during one of his daily challenges, he’ll try using a simple smile instead and see if the results are different. I have used it on flights all over the country, and I have seen how the flight attendants were more attentive to me v. others. I’ve used it when I really should have gotten a speeding ticket, only to get a warning to slow down. I’ve used it in restaurants and have found the waiters to be a little nicer to me and my group than everyone else. I’ve seen frowns turn into smiles, simply because I took the time to smile.
The smile strategy
Don’t dismiss this as a flaky strategy used by flakes and geeks. The “smile strategy” has been used effectively by great figures such as Henry Kissinger, Bill Clinton, Ronald Reagan, Oprah Winfrey, Melinda Gates, Nelson Mandela, Richard Bronson, Warren Buffet, Barak Obama, Napoleon Hill, Angela Merkel, Michelle Obama, Laurene Powell Jobs, and many more.
Do you want to become a powerful influence on people? So start with a smile. Watch amazingly successful people (even in their immediate circles) and you’ll see that they have a tendency to smile more than everyone else. Frank Irving Fletcher wrote that; a smile costs nothing, but creates a lot. It enriches the one who receives, without impoverishing the one who gives. It happens in an instant, but the memory sometimes lasts forever.
conclusion
One of the most powerful tools you have at your disposal when it comes to influencing people is simply smiling. The smile is the universal language of winners.
© 2014 Cubie Davis King. All rights reserved. Illegal to duplicate or use in any way with the express written permission of the author.
