Kindergarten debates

My daughter used to teach in kindergarten. Listening to it during those years confirmed that children say the most daring things. When I read proposals from the pack of Democrats vying for the presidency, it sounds like a kind of kindergarten when asked ‘what would you do if you were president?’ Let’s imagine that we are listening to these original ideas from the Democratic candidates.

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The student, Marianne Williamson, New Age self-help author, says she would defeat President Trump by calling for love in America. He proposes that we need a Department of Peace.

Then we have student Beto O’Rourke, the Irishman who identifies himself as Hispanic and wants to buy back all the guns in America, as well as cool the planet. And if you don’t hand over your weapon. O’Rourke says he supports forcibly confiscating them. Of course, he also wants the government to pay for everyone living on a floodplain in America to move to higher ground. Beto also wants statehood for Puerto Rico. Would he pay for everyone to move to higher ground since the entire island is a floodplain in a hurricane alley?

One of the older students in the class, Bernie Sanders, who was held back for a couple of years, says he has a plan to eliminate all medical debt in the country. He also said he has a plan to ease all student loan debt and implement the New Green Deal at a mother’s cost of $ 16 billion. That’s with a ‘T’ the teacher pointed out. When asked how he would prioritize, he said, “We have to do it all.” Furthermore, he firmly asserted that the earth could not sustain the current birth rate and that “something” must change.

A student named Elizabeth Warren, who until recently identified as Native American, says she will eliminate all fossil fuels. She will not replace any of our requirements with nuclear power. Little Miss Warren was emphatic on CNN. It also wants to ensure that all manufactured weapons do not have the ability to “fire weapons in a short period of time.” She wasn’t more specific than that, and most of the class was stumped.

Another recovery student, Joe Biden, who returned from suspension for breathing down the neck of the girls in his class, said he would get millions of vehicles off the road by building high-speed trains. He was sure he had proposed it to her before. He also said that banning guns would not be a violation of the Second Amendment. Earlier you said that Americans don’t pay attention to the Constitution anyway. He went to the directors’ office for saying he would ‘go after’ the new president of Brazil because he reminded him of President Trump.

Amy Klobucher, a new student, announced that the weather is her big focus. There are no new coal plants and nuclear power plants are not safe. He is also very sad that there are fires in the Amazon and recently said that he would do what Obama did when he was president.

Student Kamala Harris, who has had some behavioral problems and identifies as African American, said that as president she would ban plastic straws across the country. It would also force manufacturers to ‘perfect’ paper straws that are difficult to use. Ms. Harris believes that what people eat in America should be decided at the highest level of government.

Another new student that no one seemed to know is Andrew Yang. Little Mr. Yang feels that it is possible to ‘sew clouds’ to reduce the effect of climate change. He also thinks that if people were vegetarians, that would solve a lot of problems, as cow farts cause a lot of earthly problems. Yang seems to be a bit ahead of the rest of his class. He wants to change the 100-year measure of Gross Domestic Product to a more ‘environmentally responsible’ measure.

Julián Castro, a true Hispanic student, proposed that we should reserve half of all land in the United States for animals and to protect the climate. He wasn’t sure where he would find the property. Castro also feels that “environmental racism” is an important problem that he would address. The class seemed to be losing interest at this point.

That’s when the teachers’ mascot, Steve Bullock, announced his big idea: creating an Office of Rural Affairs. New student Michael Bennett had a great idea. Universal Preschool. In the middle of the unknowns of the class, Julián Castro, who already had a turn, stood up to declare that no one was listening. I had another idea. Open our Refugee Program for all ‘climate refugees’. He couldn’t name any current locations, but we’re in kindergarten.

Finally, Cory Booker, the only true African American in the class, said his idea was a mere $ 3 trillion climate program for environmental justice. He also wants to spend $ 400 billion to create a clean energy workforce.

It was then that a child who had gone unnoticed with his hand in the air made himself heard. Student Pete Buttigieg, who identifies as gay, wanted to spend just $ 1.1 trillion on climate while making America the world leader. Pete also wants Medicare for All, student loan forgiveness and thinks we should celebrate Vietnam Veterans Day.

In the end, the big surprise was that the entire class of Democratic kindergarteners had an idea. A senior student entered the class by the name of Ms. Pelosi. He announced a new Democratic resolution that read in part: “Americans without religious affiliation overwhelmingly share the values ​​of the Democratic Party and have often been subjected to unfair prejudice and exclusion in American society.” Doesn’t it surprise you, since all religions except Islam of course can no longer be discussed in school anyway? The teacher said, ‘Class over.’

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All of the above are positions of those illustrious aspiring leaders running for president of the United States. Are we hitting new lows in American leadership or have we gone crazy? You are the judge.

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